Maitreya: Miracle Or Malpractice?

File under: Satscams, The Great White Botherhood and Wackadoo Gurus

Today found us catching up on our favorite New Age™ flimflam man (and/or delusional nutbag,) Benjamin Creme, along with his inner puppet master on the outer planes (of Creme's imagination,) Maitreya. Surveying the latest issue of Share International magazine, we came upon this communication between Maitreya ("through" Creme,) and a devotee facing hip surgery:

Q. Could you please tell me what’s happening when I put photographs of Maitreya’s hand-print on my hips. I am supposed to have quite invasive surgery on them. When I put the photographs on my hips I sometimes get the most intense feeling in my hips. It comes in surges or waves and is sometimes so intense I have to stop it by taking off the photographs and walking. (1) What is taking place during these times? (2) If I keep doing it regularly will I need to have the surgery? (3) Is there healing happening?

A. (1) You are getting healing from Maitreya. (2) Almost certainly not. (3) Yes!

Suddenly, the idea of using burning incense sticks to give ourselves reverse lasik surgery to prevent ourselves from ever reading again becomes quite attractive, if we weren't already doubled-over and retching up that Wendy's we had for lunch.

We pray this person got the medical help they needed, but we think that handprint may come in handy as a hangover remedy. And just in time, too. After reading through the rest of the Share International website, nothing less than drinking obsessively for two weeks straight is going to wash the stench of that bullshit from our brain.